Phan - An Obsession with Perfection. [9]

Title: An Obsession with Perfection
Author: ~Gerards21Guns
Pairing: Phan
Rating: 12+? idk.
Disclaimer: I do not own Dan nor Phil and none of this ever happened in real life.
Author's Note: i don't even know anymore.
Summary: Dan has been at the mental hospital for 4 years now. He's there for being Bipolar and having severe OCD, but he's always had this obsession with perfection. However, Dan's life changes forever when Dan meets the mysterious Phil Lester.

Phil's POV

    Dan had improved when he woke up, he could wander off without help and he could say simple sentences. He was slowly coming back to us, although sometimes he'd wander off in a daze and we'd spend hours trying to find him since Freshman is a pretty big institute, we never found him, we'd always go back to our room and he'd be there, sitting in his chair next to the window just watching. He eventually learnt to fall asleep without the help of drugs either, he only learnt this when Lindsey was reading him Paper Towns (When she walked in he was lying on his side on his bed repeatedly saying the word 'Book') and he just drifted off.
    I was reminded of something Dan had told me before he went mental when one day I was just sitting on my bed watching the T.V while he was in his chair looking outside the window. When he suddenly spoke.
"Room." he said looking at me. The best thing about Dan coming back was the fact that he didn't completely blank you anymore and that he looked at you.
"What was that Dan?" I asked him
"Room Phil Room." he sighed.
"What's the room Dan?" I replied but he fell asleep just like that. Then I remembered and I knew what room Dan was on about.
   
     When Dan first came to Freshman, he was incredibly violent, spending most of his days in a straight jacket in solitary and lashing out at anyone who tried to help him. Lindsey believed part of it was because of his bipolar disorder and the other was simply because everything had caught up with him, but no matter what he would just hit anything. And these violent episodes weren't just a few minutes, they lasted hours, sometimes days. It was incredibly hard to sedate him as he would either run and hide or he'd lash out again. One time he told me 9 nurses had to hold him down while Lindsey gave him the sedative. Eventually they realized solitary wasn't helping him, so when he was in a daze they sedated him. He was angry at first but just like that he collapsed into an unconscious heep on the floor. He said when he woke up again he was in a room he'd never seen before, but he was tied down incredibly tightly to a thing you would see in prisons when someone was being sentenced to death. His arms were out and tied down that way instead of in and he had 2 straps on his chest, 2 on his stomach and 4 on his legs, another was holding down his head, meaning he was completely immobile. He felt drowsy and sleepy and soon saw a tube running from his arm into a bag on a pole holding some sort of transparent liquid which he realized were sedatives to keep him calm. Every attempt he made to move failed and he started panicking thinking he was going to die. Although the sedatives helped slightly it didn't stop him from pulling on the restraints and screaming. Lindsey came in a few seconds later and that was the first time he properly saw her. She gave him a look full of sympathy and apology and slowly pushed the syringe into his neck, then everything faded to black and he woke up again in solitary. Lindsey said it did happen and it wasn't just a figment of his imagination and when she looked him that day all she saw was pain in his eyes. He fell into a very deep sleep and when they moved him from the room to solitary confinement he was still sleeping and all attempts to wake him up failed.

The thing I wandered though was why Dan had mentioned it now. I was tempted to wake him up and ask him why, but that wasn't fair since he struggled to sleep naturally some nights, so I decided to ask him later. Little did I know there wouldn't be a later
    I walked down to the cafeteria with Dan at lunch. Since the attack he twitched sometimes and he had problems with people touching him. Even someone brushing past his arm in the corridor would send shudders down his spine. He seemed quite on edge.
"You alright Dan?" I asked worriedly as we walked into the cafeteria, he sent me a smile that didn't reach his eyes and nodded. Then he walked off to get his food while I sat down at a table. He rejoined me a few moments later but just played with the food on his plate.
"Dan why did you mention the room earlier?" I questioned, he froze and glanced up briefly. I knew something wasn't right, I knew I might have to push the alarm button hidden in my pocket that went straight to Lindsey's office if he was having an episode soon.
"Dan why did you mention the room?" I asked again, this time however I got a different response. His head shot up and instead of the usual 'everyone is such peasants' look he had, this one was filled with anger. Without hesitation I secretly pressed the button. His hands balled into fists and he stood up making me jump.
"Just shut up Phil! Shut the fuck up!" he screamed at me. The entire cafeteria went silent and I saw the nurses - including Alexis - get ready for the violent episode that was about to follow.
"Phil get away from him." Alexis warned beckoning me towards her. I stood up and slowly backed away from him towards Alexis. As soon as I was away he threw the table and let out a scream. Then he started pulling his own hair.
"Everybody come away." Victoria called and everyone stood up and walked to the side of the wall away from Dan. This seemed to anger him more though, as he went around the canteen and flipped all the tables he could get his hands on. Everyone looked petrified, but I just waited for it to pass. Then I heard Lindsey's voice behind me.
"We're gonna have to sedate him, but it's not as easy when he's being like this." she whispered as Dan stood there screaming and pulling harshly at his hair. She beckoned for the other nurses and they slowly walked towards him. Unfortunately for them, he noticed.
"No!" he shouted and punched the wall hard making a hole. It was only then I realized how strong he actually was. The nurses rushed forward and he lashed out. Hitting anything and everything he could. It wasn't a very pretty scene, most patients weren't looking, but I couldn't help but watch as they struggled to pin him to the floor, as 7 nurses held him down, the needle was put into his neck and he fell into unconsciousness. Lindsey and Alexis lifted him up and started carrying him out, they were already outside by the time I caught up with them.
"Hi Phil." Lindsey said as cheerily as she could without dropping Dan.
"Where are you taking him?" I asked genuinely curious.
"Y'know that room he described to you a few weeks ago?"
"Yes"
"That one." she replied. I simply nodded deciding not to argue, Dan had told me how terrified he was of that room, but solitary wouldn't help him. We walked down many corridors and up and down stairs until we got to the room they were looking for. I had to wait outside, but the door was see-through so they could keep a watch on whoever was in there. I didn't watch them changing him out of his clothes and into pyjamas but I watched as they put him on the thing that looked like something out of a prison, and started tying the restraints. They pulled out his arms and tied those down. Then they started on the many straps that held down his main body, then finally his head. Once he was tightly tied down, they got out the same bag on the pole he'd described to me and put the tube in his arm. They started talking but I couldn't hear what they were saying. Eventually they hooked him up to a heart monitor and put an oxygen mask over his face, then they walked out, smiling at me when they saw me.
"What's in that tube going into his arm?" I said
"Calming sedatives, they're much stronger than the last time he was in there so they should make sure he doesn't have an episode" Alexis replied
"When will he wake up?" I questioned
"We'll tell you when he does." she said and took me back up to my room.


Dan’s POV
   
    When I first woke up I had no idea where I was. The last thing I remembered was being in the cafeteria and being held to the floor, then I was here. It took me awhile, but when I felt my arms outstretched and tied down I knew where I was. I could hear a heart monitor and then I felt an oxygen mask on my face. I was tied down incredibly tightly and I remembered the last time I was in here. I thought I'd be angry and panicking but I actually felt strangely calm, then I once again saw the tube in my arm leading up to a bag of sedatives on a pole. They were stronger then last time and they made me feel weak and sleepy. I knew the sedatives were slowing down my brain activity which meant things would take longer to register. Then I heard a door opening and voices.
"Remember be careful, I'll be in there with you." I heard Lindsey say.
"I'll be fine." Phil said but he didn't sound so sure. Then there were 2 shadows leaning over me, my vision wasn't very good due to the drugs, but one of them sat down in a chair next to me that I didn't even know was there, and another stood over my head. I felt the restraint holding down my head being taken off, and someone who I think was Lindsey turned my head so I was looking at the person sitting in the chair which I soon realized was Phil, and then my head was tied down again.
"Hello Dan." Phil smiled. "I know you can't say anything back, but I decided to come and see you anyway." the sentence took a long time to make sense but it did eventually. I pulled on the restraints and felt that I really was immobile, but it seemed that Lindsey and Phil noticed me pulling. Phil put his arm on mine and I heard Lindsey move in the corner. Phil shook his head at me.
"Don't Dan." he said but I just looked at him through half-open eyes, the drugs were making me feel weird. He sat there in total silence rubbing his thumb over my knuckle while I just looked at him for about 45 minutes until I started to feel tired and my eyes started closing.
"You can sleep if you want." Phil said, smiling on the end. Lindsey came over, undid the head restraint, turned my head and re-did the restraint. Phil was still rubbing his thumb over my knuckle when I drifted off.